Wednesday, March 12, 2014

lubos na umaasa

napakarecent ng pitcures na ito, like... last night!  i know it's disgusting and sobrang nakakahiya.  i wanna hide these pictures. i should hide them but no i'm showing them. libre lait!  not that i'm proud of these pictures. in fact disgusted and hiyang hiya ako sa pictures ko na ito.  nakakainis na nakakaiyak na kakalungkot na almost depressing na talaga.  at 67kg, i'm at my heaviest weight by far.

kachat ko kahapon ang isang kaibigan kong undin at namention ko ang aking katabaan. sabi ng undin "wow. good. happy for you".  ??? confused. parang gusto ko sumigaw "mabigat un! ideal for me is 53kg lang" (actually 50kg lang dapat pero target ko is 53kg dahil... gusto ko lang.)
"kaya mo yan. you can say your weight. it means you can manage"... hmm ganun ba yun? nasasabi ko ang weight ko kasi i can't deny na, kasi it's obvious naman.  tama. accepted ko na meron problema sa weight, hitsura at health ko.  kailangan ko ng willingness and determination to solve this problem.  ang pinakamahirap, commitment. sa totoo lang, kanina niyaya ako ng isa pang kaibigan kumain ng pizza for lunch. so tempting! she tried to convince me but when i showed her these same pictures, shocked ang ateh! hindi na nya ako pinilit. hehe

isang barefoot runner and blogger friend naman ang nagremind sa akin about proper diet and exercise. naniniwala ako sa kanya hindi lang base sa mga nababasa at napapanood ko at dahil na rin sa nakita kong pagbabago sa kanya.  epektib!  so i don't have to feel guilty na kumain ako ng chicken adobo.  energy, kailangan ko yun! i'm not planning to starve myself.  kakain pa rin ako ng heavy breakfast, lighter but nutritious lunch at fruits for dinner.  ayoko ideprive ang sarili ko sa mga favorites ko. pero in moderation na lang talaga. i'll say goodbye to sodas.

as i'm writing this post, i'm prepping up for our workout challenge later after work.  hindi pa ito success story, otherwise "before & after" sana ang collage.  this is my journey to healthier life and i sure have a long way to go! hehe

hey kaya ko ito!

next time ko na lang ipakita yung body measures namin ng workout buddy ko. most shocking!